Sunday, May 9, 2010

goodbye guilt!!

in honor of mother's day, i'd like to share how bad of a mother i am: my kids are the ones who have to wake me up in the morning. breakfast usually consists of a pop tart, cereal, or sometimes a frozen waffle if i'm feeling generous. i hardly ever do my daughter's hair. i consider myself lucky that she brushes it before we leave the house. we let the tv entertain us during lunchtime. changing diapers and taking ryan potty are not a top priority. samantha gets into trouble a lot when i'm pmsy. i don't take them to the park enough. i yell at ryan to stop screaming. dinner usually doesn't get thought of until 5pm. i hate bathtime, therefore my children do not get bathed every day. even every other day is rare. and the list could go on...

i'm definitely not my mother, in that aspect. (she rocks. happy mother's day mom! thanks for always being loving, patient, kind, attentive, humble, and self-sacrificing. you are the best mother ever—definitely proverbs 31 in action! i love you!!) ok. back to our regular programming—i'm definitely not my mother...

but you know what? that's okay with me. i recently participated in a women's group at church and we went through the book, "mothering without guilt." until then, i never realized that most of my guilt as a mom comes from comparing myself to other moms. i would see all the good things other mothers do for their children: enroll them in extra-curricular activities, take them on trips and vacations, bring them to the movies, take them to the park, etc. and in light of others' successes as a parent, i found myself a failure.

and then i had my aha! moment one day when my friend spoke up and wisdom poured from her mouth, "A lot of times when we compare ourselves to others, we tend to compare our weaknesses with their strengths."

did you let that sink in? we are so cruel to ourselves when we only see the strengths of others and lay them side by side with our weaknesses. sure, someone else may absolutely love bathtime with their kids, but that doesn't mean i need to feel guilty because i don't enjoy it.

bottom line? God made each and every one of us uniquely for our children, giving us individual strengths. so let's not let guilt get in the way of the joy mothering can bring!

happy mother's day to all you wonderful moms. i hope you enjoyed your day—guilt free!

8 comments:

Heather said...

very true, Erin. and i don't think there's anything you SHOULD feel guilty about! you do a fabulous job! love you!

Angela said...

Very well said!!!!

A day in the Life... said...

Very True Erin! Thanks for sharing :)

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

Perfectly said my dear, perfect!!

Kelly Harris said...

Oh Erin, you are so so wise!! Love this...

Nicole said...

We have a lot in common! :)

Ace said...

Great post, how true! I'm right there with you. Little Dude would play video games 24 hours a day if I let him and he has come close before! I'm so glad the kids are old enough to shower by themselves now so I don't have to deal with splashing and bathroom clean up afterward. Our breakfasts are the same and yes, my alarm starts going off an hour and 15 minutes before I actually have to get up because even then I never hear it and usually wake up when one of the kids comes in!
But I love them. That's what counts, right?

Mary @ Giving Up On Perfect said...

Girl, you are an AWESOME mom. And an AWESOME friend! That's such a great point about comparing our weaknesses to others' strengths. UGH, I do that so often!!

And just so you know, my daughter usually wakes me up in the morning, and her breakfast almost always consists of a frozen waffle, cheerios or a granola bar. :)